Thursday, September 04, 2008

Not the best news ever

Yesterday we had to take Emma for an Echo on her heart. Today our Pediatrician's nurse called and said per the pediatric Cardiologist's notes Emma has an ASD (atrial septal defect). This news pretty much just threw me over the I think I won't be able to stop crying all stinking day edge.

The pediatrician told us he believed it was just a PDA which should close on its own and that he wasn't worried about it at all because Emma is in the 75th percentile on both her weight and height. He believed if something was really wrong she would not be gaining weight like she is and would not look as good as she does and would not be as alert as she is. But it isn't a PDA it is an ASD neither of which I know a darn thing about so I have been pretty scared and upset all day. If the problem were HEY she is a genius and we need to fund college right now so she can start this semester I could handle that but I hear heart problems and all I see and hear in my head immediately is all of the stuff my family has been through already with my grandparents.

On the lighter side I have been of course googling this all day since I found out and the hole in her heart (ASD) can also sometimes close naturally on its own. If not she may have to have open heart surgery to patch it or have an procedure done through a heart cath were the patch/plug the hole. So it sounds like it can be fixed. I am just a wreck.

I just want to hold her so tight and never let her go.

On top of this when I called to tell my mom she tells me that my granddaddy is having a heart cath next weekend. About 14 years ago he had a quadruple by pass and last 4th of July he had open heart surgery again and had 6 by passes done. He is having chest pains much more frequently so they did a stress test and didn't see anything and so this is the next step. He is 77 years old this year and the cornerstone of our family. He is my compass in life. He is my role model to this day. He is the person I look up to most in my life. My head knows he can not live forever but my heart just isn't getting it.

Today hasn't been the best day.

1 comment:

ajs4ever said...

I am so sorry to hear the news. Braden has some kidney issues so I know it is so scary when there is nothing we can do to help them. Just say lots of prayers and I will add her to my prayer list too! Hang in there:)